A sister to our cousin was buried yesterday and I hurt about it even though I'd never met her. I know that she would be just like her sister, always smiling, always laughing and an infectious laugh. It hurts more when lives are gone while young, while there is so much more to give and with the world waiting for our presence to be felt. I'm emotional because it feels too close to home, too close to me and yet so real. I want to write the poems of my heart, the hurt it feels and the bits hiding in its darkness. Maybe soon I'll find the flow to do it. In the mean time, enjoy what you have. We are too caught up in life's worries that life itself is passing us by. Love you B, rest easy Lofty Tua-Tupou ❤
2 Months without you
You've been gone for two months and it still feels unreal. It's not like you've popped down the road and you'll be back and that's the stink thing. You won't ever be back in our lives. Since your passing people are passing tragically, as a result of unnecessary things. I'm finding it hard to contain the emotions of it all, even though I'm not related. I feel like I have to grieve with the families. Sorry, I know you don't want to hear me go on. But after you it feels like time bombs are going off left right and centre. Things are close to home and in direct contact with those I know. I hate the feeling of losing someone, that I'm dreading that same news in my own family (touch wood) I hate feeling like I'm preparing emotionally for it and in all honesty, I am in no way prepared at all. I'm not prepared to make that 2 hour flight home, because of someone's death. Well not just someone's but my own immediate family. A baby in your families family, your Aunty, a Koro! Too much too soon, too raw and too close. The way you passed sucks! Im annoyed, angry and peed off but I have to let justice be served where it's needed. Hope heavens a cool place, cos I think it will be.
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